I guess the hardest thing is letting them go and making sure they know they don’t have to worry about their parents.
I think being an adult is learning to look after yourself (mind /body/environment) so others don’t have to worry about you. In other words put your own happiness first.
A bit like the life jacket thing on a plane.
I find it hard to be that selfish but that is what I am doing now. You can help people a little but really they can only help themselves using their own resources.
It’s very important not to create dependency – that doesn’t help anyone.
As a wise daughter says – do whatever makes you happy. That is the guide to your choices in life.
I find a double negative works best for me. I don’t do anything that makes me unhappy.
I don’t spend time around people that make me unhappy.
My next door neighbour (an artist) says if you can keep yourself tuned (she says clean) and open then you can rely completely on intuition.
The way for children to learn to be an adult is to see you happy.
Unhappy parents are an unfair emotional burden. We had to carry ours. I’m not passing it on.
I am jettisoning the load now rather wait until they’ve left home.